This is why I believe the root cause of infidelity can usually be traced back to either anger or lust. I have two college aged children that depend on both of us financially and I feel like I owe it to them to stay with him. While it can take time to rebuild trust, be hopeful in moving forward. They disguise or suppress the fact that wrong actions can only lead to wrong results. Think about it this way… Imagine your emotions are like food coloring, and reality life is like a tall glass of water.
How can self-forgiveness be automatic? Choose to believe what he says instead of questioning it or doubting it. He said it was never physical but i finf it hard to beleive him. Now I am hurt and dont know what to do. Some people have lists as long as my arm. And if I can do it, so can you.
None of us is perfect. Forgiveness may feel impossible right now as you struggle to make sense of their actions. I wish he had never met me and I were never born. Last week I asked him who he was textng and he ignored me. I was so happened to scroll through the only name in his new phone and felt so disappointed, he betrayed my trust again.
Probably for a long while. I know you will get some great advice here. This was during a time period when he had been laid off from his job. Think of it as flushing rusty water from a tap. Not only of one but several women. Be accountable for your actions. Take time away if you need it.
I just feel like I am about to explode. I love my family and my wife but I honestly don't understand why she wants to remain married? Our sense of fairness tells us people should pay for their wrongs. We are trying very hard, both together and separately. Whatever was happening in your life before the affair still needs to be addressed. I have been told that I am an unforgiving person because I haven't been able to entirely put the affairs behind me and return to the person I was before.
Use your writing to reflect on the experience and write how you feel. This is why so many women deny emotional cheating and, as unbelievable as it sounds, feel like they should be allowed to continue the affair they might call it a even after it's exposed. Any advice on how to heal without the help of your partner? In fact, I have found that if the following traits are not present, then both are typically filling what I call a bag full of holes. This is why a lot of people smart people, rich people, popular people, and yes, even good people can still make poor choices. I take care of our baby 24 hours while he works to make ends meet. My question is wheter or not i was in the wrong when i told him i would try and was unable to. He only confessed after I called her.
Your daily emails and thoughts have been a God send. Perhaps a counselor or close friend. Also, I don't wish to blame him for making me feel this way even though, in essence he did -- but rather wish to share my pain that he can help me overcome. Forgiving your spouse cannot be conditional on their behavior or if the marriage is going to survive. Especially after I have let you down, disgraced you, turned my back on you, and squandered your treasures? What they are is human, and even the good ones will make catastrophic mistakes sometimes.
Many hard conversations will need to happen. Obsessing over it also does not help, and to me I have found distancing from my partner is helping me think clearly. It took 9 months for him to tell me and the counselor about all of them. Each time an additional consequence occurs it also has to be released. What was missing in the relationship and how can that change? Afterwards I went to gynecologist and got some estrogen cream and things have been amazing!! Can either of you see that changing? Also, when someone says that they will forgive their mate they really need to understand what that entails.